The quick brown fox jumped over the good, but lazy Parker family.

the end of baseball in washington

Saturday, 23 May 2009

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photo.jpg, originally uploaded by [ecpark].
i might be about done with the washington nationals.

the austin spaklers are in town for the lady sparkler’s birthday, and to get some some quality time with her belly. it’d been a year since we saw a nats game, so we tossed in one of those for good measure.

it turned out that we had three sets of friends there, and we had a great time all around. the food — ben’s chili bowl, again — was fantastic. the stadium is beautiful.

but the game was awful.

of course, part of that might be because the nationals are awful. luckily, they were facing the orioles … who are equally awful.

the two teams are averaging 6 runs allowed per game. together, they allow more people on base than any other teams in the league. washington leads the league in errors, and baltimore is close behind. both are in last place in their division.

all that futility should mean a scorcher of a game. but alas, did i mention it was awful?

i swear, there was 20 minutes between each inning. it took until the 5th inning for washington to score its first run (which would also be the last). the game was over in two hours and 31 minutes, but i would have guessed it was twice that.

in fact, when nat’s shortstop Cristian Guzman homered in the 5th i was excited … until i realized that it tied the game, vastly increasing the chance it would go into extra innings.

(not to worry, tho, as baltimore “stormed” back to win 2-1.)

but worst of all, we had to watch all the happy O’s fans … who have to win the award for most socially awkward fan base in the country.

i know that baseball is a game of stats (which is probably a polite way of saying math geeks) but O’s fans makes red sox and yankees fans look normal by comparison … preppy or thuggy, as the case may be, but without that certain “a/v club” veneer.

but, at least the O’s have fans.

honestly, the nats would have better success if they built a giant bar, with great food, a huge HD television, and a $25 cover charge. that way DCers could come and socialize, without feeling guilty about paying attention a baseball game.

(wait, that’s actually what they did …)

in the end, the two-plus hours where i didn’t watch the game was great, but the 20 minutes of the game i watched during pauses in the social agenda felt like an afternoon at the dmv.

it took forever, and no one was particularly happy with how it turned out.