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We just got back from the second of our three church counseling sessions with the man who would marry us, Rev. Dean J. Snyder. At the end of the first session, he administered the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator test to us. Now, at the second session, he promised to review the results with us.
And, oh, what results they were.
Turns out that of the four bands (Extraversion vs Introversion, Sensing vs Intuition, Thinking vs Feeling, Judging vs Perceiving) we were at the opposite ends of all but one. The Lady Sparkler is a ESTJ, and I am an ENFP.
Below are some highlights of our personalities:
Favorite world: Do you prefer to focus on the outer world or on your own inner world?
People with a preference for Extraversion (both she and I) draw energy from action: they tend to act, then reflect, then act further. If they are inactive, their level of energy and motivation tends to decline.
Information: Do you prefer to focus on the basic information you take in or do you prefer to interpret and add meaning?
Individuals with a preference for Sensing (The Lady Sparkler) prefer to trust information that is in the present, tangible and concrete: information can be comprehended by the five senses. They prefer to look for detail and facts.
Those with a preference for Intuition (Evan) will trust information that is more abstract or theoretical, that can be associated with other information. They are more interested in future possibilities.
Decisions: When making decisions, do you prefer to first look at logic and consistency or first look at the people and special circumstances?
Those with a preference for Feeling (Evan) will prefer to come to decisions by associating or empathising with the situation, looking at it ‘from the inside’ to achieve the greatest harmony, consensus and fit with their personal set of values.
Those with a preference for Thinking (The Lady Sparkler) will prefer to decide things from a more detached standpoint, measuring the decision by what is reasonable, logical, causal, consistent and matching a given set of rules.
Structure: In dealing with the outside world, do you prefer to get things decided or do you prefer to stay open to new information and options?
People with a preference for Judging (The Lady Sparkler) prefer matters to be decided, to start tasks well ahead of a deadline, and they can sometimes seem inflexible in this regard.
Those whose preference is Perceiving (Evan) are happier to leave finishing a task until close to the deadline, are energised late rushes of information and ideas, and are readier to change plans if new information comes along.
In retrospect, it’s funny/encouraging/touching that our number one response to the question “why do you like each other” over the last three years has been that the other “balances me.”
Maybe there is hope for us yet.